The Rearview Mirror

Speech at Sudheer and Kristine's Wedding

June 20, 2026


[I delivered the following speech at my son Sudheer's wedding. While written for a particular occasion, it reflects on a transition familiar to many parents: the moment when children begin their own journey and parents gradually recede into the rearview mirror.]


Weddings are among the happiest moments in life, perhaps even more so when it is the youngest child getting married.

Like all fathers, I have countless memories of Sudheer growing up. Bringing up the boys in the Bronx, I still remember sitting on the front porch steps, with one child on each side, relaxing at the end of the day.

One memory always makes me smile. We were driving home from the Bronx Zoo when three-year-old Sudheer asked his brother, “Why doesn’t Daddy just write a check for a million dollars so we can all be rich?” At the time, I had to explain that life does not work that way. But today, I can confidently say that someday soon you may be able to write that check to yourself. More importantly, you have learned the lesson behind it—the old saying about teaching a person how to fish rather than giving him a fish, and that lesson has served you well.

As the years passed, the conversations changed. In middle school, Sudheer used to say, “Daddy comes through one door and goes through the other door.” Of course, what he meant was that I would come home from work and then head straight outside to work in the backyard. But I always tried to be back in time for what mattered most. The four of us would sit down together for dinner, watch Jeopardy, and sometimes enjoy the Telugu comedy Amrutham. Looking back, those simple evenings became some of the most treasured moments of our family life.

Then came high school, and one day Sudheer made another observation. He said, “Daddy never works nine to five.” He was right. I was fortunate throughout my career to have a flexible work style that allowed me to be present whenever one of my boys needed me. Whether it was a school event, a doctor appointment, a ride somewhere, or simply being available, I tried my best to be there.

But that was then. Today is different.

Sudheer, you now have Kristine by your side.

Kristine, from the day you first visited our house, it was clear to Auntie and me that you brought happiness, confidence, and balance into Sudheer's life. One memory remains firmly etched in our minds—the way you held his hand as the two of you were leaving that day. It was a simple gesture, but it spoke volumes. As parents, one of the greatest comforts is seeing your child with someone who genuinely cares for them, and we saw that in you from the very beginning, a quality reflected in the profession you chose.

From this day forward, you will share each other's victories and disappointments, plans and uncertainties, ordinary Tuesdays and special celebrations. You will be each other's source of strength and companionship long after Mom and I are gone, and that is exactly as it should be.

The responsibility that once belonged largely to your parents now belongs to the two of you, shared equally as partners on the journey ahead. Together, you will build a life that is uniquely your own.

And that brings me to a few thoughts for the newlyweds.

People often wonder what makes a successful marriage. After many decades of marriage myself, I have learned that it is rarely the big moments that matter most. It is the thousands of ordinary days in between. Be kind to each other. Be patient with each other. Listen carefully, especially when you disagree. Celebrate each other's successes as if they were your own. And never underestimate the value of laughter.

As your life together stretches out before you, remember that the journey is not about perfection. It is about partnership. Two people moving through life side by side, helping each other become the best versions of themselves.

And remember something else. Life has a way of changing who occupies the center of our world. For many years, your parents were there to guide, support, and occasionally worry about you. That is how it should be. But from this day forward, your primary companion is each other. Your closest circle will increasingly be built around your marriage, your family, your friends, and the life you create together. We, parents, gradually move into the rearview mirror—not forgotten, just happily watching as you drive confidently down your own road.

For parents, that is not a loss. It is a privilege. We spend years helping our children prepare for the future, and then one day we get to watch them step into it. That day has arrived for Mom and me.

Sudheer and Kristine, your story together is just beginning. May your home be filled with love, laughter, good health, friendship, and endless happy memories.
 
Dheergayushman bhava!

With love,
Mom and Dad


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